What’s green with lots of numbers?
Uh, I don’t know … the Matrix?
No? Oh it’s money, I see. Except it’s money promised in spam, and spam from the military. How did I get on their list, I wonder. Maybe because of this guy?
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To: [me] From: “Army National Guard” Subject: What’s green with lots of numbers? Reply-To: “Army National Guard” Errors-To: [email protected] Date: Thu, 1 Feb 2007 06:51:50 CST That’s right. The universal language of cold, hard cash. How does up to $56,000 sound? If you’ve checked out the Guard’s “College First” Enlistment Option* and aren’t convinced the Guard can help you get through college – if up to $20,000 for enlisting isn’t enough, then it’s time to up the ante. You can get up to a $20,000 enlistment bonus, up to $20,000 to repay student loans, more than $4,000 a year for continued schooling, and as much as $12,000 in pay your first year of part-time service. That’s more than $56,000. But you have to act now. Up to 100% Tuition Assistance * “College First” Enlistment Option not available in all states |
Sorry, fellas, but warm, soft direct-deposits from the NSF sounds a lot better, especially because I kind of like my unextreme unadventurous life. And life is the key.
